Huh!!! i think i may even create a record on “stopped blogging.. started again” kindof posts.. But you do have to understand.. The kindof things which make you have the kick to blog donot come and go often.
I think, the kick is here again.
I think, the kick is here again.
Its been 1 month plus, since my last post.. The problem was, whenever i take up the “write post” page, the only thing that comes to my mind is.. well.. of course, her.
And since I never had an opportunity to get a direct reply from her, It would make me look soo stupid if i go on writing things about her again and again. Even though, I should confess.. Today, I’m here to write about her. Again.
And since I never had an opportunity to get a direct reply from her, It would make me look soo stupid if i go on writing things about her again and again. Even though, I should confess.. Today, I’m here to write about her. Again.
In those days, when this uncurable stupid itching started, I had this serious trouble I could talk to anybody on earth, a person of any sex, caste, creed, capacities, whatever.. about anything at all. No matter whatever crap I may be telling, I could TALK. But not to her.
I could storm in or out of any situation, however dire it may seem to be.. turn the entire scenario upside down.. make a BIG huge dramatic impression for no cause whatsoever.. bla bla.. But…
I could storm in or out of any situation, however dire it may seem to be.. turn the entire scenario upside down.. make a BIG huge dramatic impression for no cause whatsoever.. bla bla.. But…
But, I couldn’t even put up one full sentence before her.
Those days, it seemed like, she was given to me.. to reduce my hauter!!! A scourge of God, to make me know how pathetic I am!!
But I tell you now. Those days are over and done with.
But I tell you now. Those days are over and done with.
Today, I happily stand here with pride, with a kindof an arrogantly proud kick,when I know it that she do like me. I aint says she loves me. But she do like me, which is a fact that I’m ready to wager with all the precious I posess.
In the midst of these lovely days, in these days of smiles and prayers, even though when the 14th seems far off, my heart is kicking around to confess it to you, my would be better half, that. my dear.. it is you, that makes me complete. It is only you who can ever make me whole and imperforate.
I have no wish but to make you happy. No urge but to make you feel safe. No thirst but to keep you smiling.
I just want you to be with me. Simple.
I just want you to be with me. Simple.
3 days from now, I’ll be standing in front of you. Surely, i’ll be trembling. By trembling, I do mean hands, legs and the entire body shaking like hell!! My goddamn cheeks will be blushed to apple red. well, I cannot blame the cheeks alone.. Presumably, there will be a crimson glow around me!! cannot help it, its just the tension of the confession. God bless me if I wont have a stupor or even, a coma. I think I’ll be scratching my head, or temple.. as my body will be fearing that i’m acting reeeaaal stupid. There will be., most defenitely WILL BE, a situation when i’ll be at a complete loss of words..
If all these things ARE going to happen, why am I telling this to you?? simple!! Because, I’m not sure if I’ll be able to convey completely what is in my heart to you.. In your situation of shock, confusion, and turmoil… and my situation of unconrollable blabering or indefenite muteness(whatever, i donot know..) all I would want you to know is, A purer desire cannot exist.
I know, the relation is at stake the moment i utter the golden charm, that I love you. You may turn your face from me. And, I’ll still be loving you.. even if that will mean a slap, or even a fullstop to all the smiles we share now… I’ll still be loving you.
Think of it, my dear.
Think of it..
After all… I’m just a boy, standing in front of a girl, asking her to love him. asking you to love me.
PS: I do not know how or why, all the she’s became you’s. maybe because, it became too personal for me to distinguish beteween the two. I do not know when or if at all, you’ll be reading this. But I do wish from the bottom of my heart, that you read this once. Atleast once. You read this and know what is that i feel for you.
February 12, 2008 at 12:50 am
Couldn’t help quoting the famous dialouge from Notting Hill at the conclusion.
“I’m also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her” plus swapping the gender!!
It took around 4 hours, to complete the post. Mostly because.. it became too personal for me. Perhaps!! what can I say!!
February 12, 2008 at 1:34 am
You silly Young People
Dude, get over it already! Love is just a fool’s errand.. Its like when your bladders are full – when you gotta go, you gotta go!
Oh well, I’m not going to ruin all the fun though – go ahead, propose your love. Let the pain begin..
P.S: You’ll laugh at yourself in a couple of years, while reading this post. Don’t let me say ‘I told you so!’.
February 12, 2008 at 7:01 am
@ Ashley bhai,
love always was a fool’s errand for me, when i could think properly and behave properly,
It always was a fool’s errand to the moment i joined the party..
the bladders are full. Man, its not just full, its gonna be bursting!!
I may laugh at myself for the stupidity later, but today, Its the only thing which i cannot laugh about!! Contradictory, but that is what it is..
and I, hoplessly sinking down!
February 12, 2008 at 8:31 am
njaanippo enna parayana jeeva…all d bst !!!
February 12, 2008 at 11:08 am
@mridul
thnx da. an additional praying soul is most welcome..
but, you didnt say nything about the writing!!
February 12, 2008 at 6:50 pm
jeeva, this is simply ur best post ever..i wanted to point out some parts of the post which i liked best,but then, i can’t omit anything.it’s all too good.
the conclusion is sooooo good.’notting hill’ is one of my favourites too.
what shall i say…all the best.
all i can do is pray.
February 12, 2008 at 7:00 pm
gee!! thanx meeraji.
well, as we’ve already pointed out, this, along with the 2 formers concerning Ms. X is way better than the others, just because..
These come from my heart and the others, from my thought.
Do pray for me.. The crimson glow is dawning.. sathyam.. i can see my face!!! blushed like hell!!
Do pray for me. Do pray for us, Even though you’re in darkness.. Do pray.
February 12, 2008 at 9:55 pm
hmmm….
2 more days to go and i think i’m already getting a fever…
chetaa,, go for it..!!
God bless…
February 12, 2008 at 11:38 pm
dude,
the post is awsome..and about the things thats thru ur heart and mind,i know exactly what’s stuffed inside u….so as i said bro…need any help…i can always be a messenger….u know like a messenger btw the hearts…anyway,dont think about it a lot…just tell her on the day….coz u think lot…u screw things a lot…
February 12, 2008 at 11:58 pm
yaa.. I want to deliver it direct. appreciate the concern, Thanks a looot!!
do pray for me.. becasse, whether i think about it or no, I’m gonna screw it up!
February 14, 2008 at 11:34 pm
Ah!
This blog is alive afterall!
Kidding man. And very bad you still haven’t told her! Go for it bro! Good Luck!
February 15, 2008 at 7:13 am
@narain
hehe.. loved that..
said. and got the reply..
enuf big for a new post. ‘ll be posting today eve.:)
Thanx for all u uys who prayed!!
Luv ya all. muaah!!
February 15, 2008 at 11:50 am
What? When? Where? Who? How?
Ah! Yester was Feb 14!
I totally forgot!
February 29, 2008 at 8:46 am
woh that was g8 writing jeeva..i didn’t know that u r a writer..keep it up..tell ur heart’s desire before its too late, be bold ..man